Saturday 10 December 2011

Cut here —————–✄———————-


Here are some Funny Facebook Status for the users. One can use the Funny Status on their Facebook, Google Plus, Twitter or any other social media sites as their status update:

  • Cut here —————–✄———————-
  • Just changed my wifi name to, "I watch you get naked" to stir up some chatter before the neighborhood Christmas Party...Also, because I do.
  • It recently became apparent to me that the letters 'T' and 'G' are far too close together on a keyboard. This is why I'll never be ending an e-mail with the phrase "Regards" ever again.
  • The awkward moment when you`re reading someone`s shirt and it looks like you`re staring at their boobs...
  • Oooooh, thats a bit too harsh. Let me put a `lol` at the end of it.
  • i’ve yet to meet a woman who got pregnant from swallowing.
  • The akward moment when your brushing your teeth and you realize that your using someone else´s brush
  • Dear Headphones, stop having rough sex in my pocket. Sincerely, tired of untangling.
  • Dear Pinocchio, So.. all I have to do is lie? Sincerely, Voldemort.
  • My psychologist didn't really mean it when she encouraged me to “bare all”...
  • How To Be A Hero tip: When destroying the enemy be sure to kill all the criminals in reverse order of importance before confronting the kingpin himself.
  • Marshmallows can`t fly, I can`t fly. Therefore I am a marshmallow...
  • Boys are like baby diapers when they get to be filled with shit they are thrown to be replaced.
  • When i die don’t write “R.I.P” on my grave… write “B.R.B”
  • Dear Hair, if you`d cooperate, we wouldn`t have to do this the hard way. Sincerely, Hot straightener.
  • "How do I look?" Friend: "You look fine." Good Friend: "You look really pretty." Best Friend:"You look horrible"
  • If you`re texting two people at the same time, you are biTextual...
  • went to the book store earlier to buy a 'Where's Wally' book. When I got there, I couldn't find the book anywhere. Well played Wally, well played.
  • doesn't exercise on weekends because I know that at some point I'll be running in heels and climbing through a 2nd story window.
  • The only place you find success before work is in the dictionary.

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