WARNING: Objects in mirror are fatter than they appear

Here are some Funny Facebook Status for the users. One can use the Funny Status on their Facebook, Google Plus, Twitter or any other social media sites as their status update:

• WARNING: Objects in mirror are fatter than they appear.
• Dear Santa: I have been good for the past week or so. Lets just focus on that.
• Rick is normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.
• That awkward moment when you realize you were talking to yourself.
• Parents call it "talking back", we call it "answering your question"
• I think my girlfriend has had sixty-one boyfriends before me. She calls me her sixty second lover.
• *Ignores phone call* -After texts person- "You called?"
• Voldemort is like a teenage girl. He has a diary, a tiara, a special cup, a pet he adores, and an obsession with a famous teenage boy.
• Kiran is experiencing life at a rate of several wtf's a minute
• That annoying moment when you`re talking, then interrupted & can`t remember what you were talking about.
• Lies That Always Worked - I`ve never done this before, but you`re Different!
• That would suck if your name was Rick Shaw and you lived in China.
• Sleep is my drug, my bed is my dealer, & my alarm clock is the police.
• 3 reasons to stand up: 1) to get the remote 2) to go to the bathroom 3) because you`re the real slim shady...
• That Awkward Moment when you drop your iPod and your headphones save its life.
• Dude! He just called you a thief! Oh HELL NO, hold his wallet!
• just received a coupon in the mail: Buy one sock, get one FREE! While socks last.
• No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping paper tube is still a light saber.
• Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.